Apparently, if you chuck a frog into a pan of
boiling water, it will hop straight out again. But
if you put him in cold water and slowly heat it
up, he will sit there until well and truly
poached.
Problems due to missing 'basics' in peoples lives
tend to develop over time, and so can be easily
missed. Then, when the problem arises - be it
anxiety, depression, addiction or some other nasty
- they can't for the life of them fathom out why!
It's therefore a great idea to know what your own
garden needs in order to grow well, so when you
see something starting to wither, you can check
your list and apply the necessary nutrients.
So here's the list. (At least, our list. If you
think we've missed any, do let us know!)
1. The need to give and receive attention.
"No Man Is An Island"
Without regular quality contact with other people,
mental condition, emotional state and behavior can
suffer quite drastically. This is often
particularly obvious in elderly people who have
become isolated. After days alone, their first
contact may be their GP, who sees them for 10
minutes.
They are highly likely during this short period to
appear 'strange' as their thwarted need for
attention asserts itself in an outpouring of
communication. If the GP takes this as
representative of the patient's general mental
condition, they may prescribe drugs, where really
a few hours of being listened to would suffice.
You may also have noticed this in evening-class
attendees who command the teacher's attention all
the time, asking seemingly daft questions and not
really listening to the answers!
2. Taking heed of the mind body connection.
This is so important, and so often neglected.
Without correct and regular nutrition, sleep and
exercise, your psychological state can suffer
considerably. It is often seen that young people,
on leaving home and the structure that provides,
succumb to one mental illness or another. Their
mealtimes, sleep patterns and other regular habits
become disrupted, with predictable consequences.
It seems that people are increasingly treating
themselves as machines!
3. The need for purpose, goals and meaning.
"The devil will make work for idle hands to do."
Perhaps the overriding element that sets human
beings apart from other animals is the ability to
identify, analyze and solve problems. This is what
enabled us to develop to where we have.
If this ability is under-used, the imagination can
start to create problems of its own - perhaps in
an attempt to give you something to do because it
is not occupied doing anything else.
Regardless, if a person is deprived of the outward
focus and satisfaction created by achieving goals,
mental illness is often close behind.
The need for meaning is perhaps even more
profound. Viktor Frankl's book 'Man's Search for
Meaning' documents the impact of lack of meaning
on concentration camp prisoners, of which he was
one. He says in it that "What is the meaning of
life?" is a question that is asked of you, not one
that you yourself ask. It is a hugely powerful and
important read when considering mental health.
4. Connection to something bigger than oneself.
Tying in with the need for meaning, this basic
need provides a context for a person. It gives
them a reason for being, over and above their own
personal needs, that has been shown to benefit the
immune system, mental health and happiness.
The obvious candidate would be religion, but can
also be an idea shared with others, a club,
charity work. In fact, anything that takes the
focus off the self.
5. The need for creativity and stimulation.
Learning something new, expanding horizons,
improving on existing skills all provide a
sensation of progress and achievement. Without
this, a person can feel worthless, or that there
is no real reason for their being.
6. The need to feel understood and connected.
Tying in with the need for attention, it seems
that people have a need to share their ideas,
hopes and dreams with others close to them. For
some, this can be as simple a talking to a loved
pet, but for most of us, it requires that we have
at least one individual with whom we can converse
'on the same level'.
7. The need to feel a sense of control.
"All your eggs in one basket."
The results of total loss of control over your
surroundings, relationships or body are not hard
to imagine, and have been well documented.
From survivors of torture, to someone losing their
job, those who are able to maintain a sense of
control somewhere in their life fare the best.
This is why having a variety of interests and
activities is so important.
Many Needs, One Life
It may seem that a life that meets all of these
needs would be intolerably busy. But of course,
one activity can meet many needs. Charity work for
example, could be said to fulfill 1, 3, 4 and 5,
and could contribute to 6 and 7.
Walking with a friend as a pastime might go
towards 1, 2, 3, 5 and 6.
Generally, what this suggests, and what has been
borne out by recent research, is that a more
complex life is a more healthy one.
Then if one area of life fails or is taken away
from you, your basic needs are maintained, at
least in part, by those that survive.
So the message is...
If your progress through life has gone a bit awry
for you or a friend, check if there is petrol in
the car, and that the battery is charged before
going to a mechanic to have the engine taken
apart!
